Its been many years since we felt the call to adopt and finished our training so you may wonder why we don’t have any adopted children yet? Well that’s a complex question for me to answer in a way, because I don’t want really think that everyone may understand MY convictions in this very personal matter in my life.
Before I felt the call to adopt I felt the call to trust the Lord with my family size. Doesn’t that sound a little backwards in our society today? Yes, trust someone other than myself or my husband, our doctor, O.B, our moms, the stranger in the checkout line or even some dear friends and a local Pastor. You see lots of people had Something to say about this decision even though they weren’t us and had never walked a day in our shoes.
Why would we want to have MORE? ugh….
Well the truth is that I flat out believed what the Bible said about children being a blessing. That’s a plural there folks. CHILDREN. So my sweet hubby (also trusting) and I embarked on a journey of blessing and sorrow that most people cannot fathom. In the course of 11 years we were expecting 16 times, ended up with 6 children under 9 and 10 teeny babies in Heaven. There are days where I imagine what my house looks like in Heaven and I pray that those babies are in there waiting for my arrival party.
The worst of it all was that as I was jeered at, snarled at, told I didn’t have to do this, and endured the question “don’t ya know what causes that S*#!?” , I silently suffered behind closed doors and grieved like a Momma that’s lost 11 babies (total) to miscarriage. While I was being told I was crazy for whatever baby I was carrying at the time, I was also trying not to think about all the others I also carried and loved and made name lists for. Sometimes along the way there would be a gap between babies born, sometimes even a few years,and people who knew my convictions would come over with a little gloaty look on their face, chat me up with small talk and a little catch up on my kids ages and then the question ” Are you going to have any more?”
Do you know hard it is to swallow a question like that and respond with grace when you know they are expecting you to say you went for a snip rather than you are willing to look like a fool for Jesus and go for broke?
It was very hard.
It was also hard to face the question why not just adopt? Quit what you are doing and just adopt?
Like adoption is supposed to be E-Z!!!
We wanted to fulfill our first conviction and see how many more times we could open up our hearts and trust God even through the losses that there might be one more here on earth before we could move on to build our family further through adoption. So here we are.
We have had many miscarriages over the last 2 years and I am now closer to 50 than 40 and we have decided its time to trust the Lord again, but this time in adoption. We are praying and talking and researching and hoping that there are a couple of little siblings out there that are meant for the Morrison tribe so we can sleep at night knowing that we have fulfilled another calling and have filled up a little more space in our hearts that we know is there for them.
There aren’t a lot of options for a large family like ours but we are going to choose one and pray and hope that God will fulfill this desire that we have to make a difference in the children that he chooses for us. There have already been many questions . Why more? Isn’t your family so full already? Why international adoption? Well The bible says that He places the lonely in families and I know that this is also true because look where I am.